What Us Single Girls Have to Put Up With.

It’s been nearly a year and a half since I was last on Match.com. I’ve been playing with the idea of rejoining since I’m new to Michigan and my profile has kind of gotten a lot of attention since moving here. Due to being unemployed and broke, however, I haven’t spent the ridiculous price they want to charge me for a membership. Instead I’ve been a little more active on Plenty of Fish, an online dating site that is free that I have also been a member of for a couple years, but haven’t met anyone off of it. When I said I was being a little more active, I meant I check my emails once a week as opposed to once a month.

Last night I received a treasure. It was so amazing, I have to share it with you right now. Keep in mind that he had emailed me just five hours prior and I had yet to read that email. I’m not changing anything, not even the awful spelling and grammar mistakes.

Subject: Right 2 judge?

i knew you wern’t going to return my message, and thats why guys like me judge women like you and know we dont stand a chance in hell. but no woman ever has any backbone just to be honest and say they’re not attracted to someone, so i’m sure you will make an excuse like we dont have anythng in common just so you dont have to look shallow

it’s funny how we always see women like you with the tall,athletic guys with the moosed up spiky hair or a ball cap backwards,(with an affliction shirt on as well)but we never see you with the kind of guys that look like they did well in science and math.( a harry potter look) pretty much the guys you were too cool to talk to in high school. and then again women like you never understand why you get judged. well i was right to judge you, because i was willing to bet my soul that you wernt writing back

oh let me guess again, you’re going to write me and tell me how i dont know you and want you go for. save it, i have yet to see a beautiful girl with anything less than someone that their friends would be envious of as far as looks. please dont take too much offense, i’m just getting sick of how women continue to go after te same guy that constantly screw them over. nice guys are constantly losing faith of why they’re nice. pretty soon there will be no nice guys left because they will have figured out thats how you dont get women

And this is from, I’m guessing, a self-proclaimed NICE guy, right?

At first I was a little confused because I was like, is this some kind of weird twisted way to hit on me? I mean, I get some pretty bizarre emails. I was married AND divorced in one (that one did make me laugh, I’ll be honest. It was clever.), and in another I was so hot flames were shooting out of my head and the guy would have to use oven mitts in order to shake my hand. There’s a reason I’m not very active on this site.

Then I see that he had sent an email earlier in the day. Now, not to brag but I get 20-30 emails a day and it’s hard to keep track of them all, especially when you’re only checking once a week. I cannot reply to every single one to tell them I’m not interested.

After wanting to write him a nasty reply back and get all stabby, I just started laughing. Hysterically. I mean, REALLY? I’m going to let this guy put a wrench in my perfectly nice day? Just read the email! It’s ridiculous! Not only is everything untrue, he’s desperate and had already written me off before he had even written me the first email. Why did he bother?

So then I had this genius idea. I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who are on dating sites and have gotten some pretty ridiculous emails. I should have people send them to me so I can put them up here. Great idea right?


Oh come on, it wouldn’t be that bad. It’d be pretty funny actually!

I can see the point you make about it being kinda mean to the people who put effort into these emails and then have people like me mock them on the internets. But really, they’re almost asking for it when they say things like “Are you on the naughty or nice list?”.

I’m on the naughty list, baby. Want to join me?


What are your thoughts? Awesome idea or should I just go straight to hell and not stop at Go?

21 Responses

  1. Haha, well, the best thing would be if you emailed him back politely and pointed out that since he’d only just emailed you earlier that day, you didn’t have a chance to respond for whatever obvious reason – out Christmas shopping, didn’t check email until that night, etc.

    Then he’ll feel like an idio!

  2. I met my boyfriend of one year on OKCupid.com.

    It’s free. Nuff said.

    I also support your motion to collect awful dating site emails. I think that’s brilliant.

  3. I always found the free dating sites to be filled with the freaks and the freak-outs. You found yourself a winner.

    That said, I’m not sure anyone wants our more desperate moments aired on the internet. If you wouldn’t want yours aired on someone else’s blog, I say don’t air theirs here.

  4. I would say this email is pretty clearly about him and his own insecurities, and no at at all about you. I’d just appreciate the compliment and move on.

  5. I love this idea. I’m thinking I should sign up for this plenty of fish thing just so I can contribute ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. I agree completely with Jess. This guy has probably made that experience (the one he describes), but well, throwing it in just any girl’s face after not replying after five hours? That’s not going to land him a great girl.
    I particularly like this line: ” please dont take too much offense”
    I’d say, take what little nice there is as a compliment (hey he did mention you are BEAUTIFUL!).
    Whether you write him back or not? Well, I don’t know. I suppose it you do, I would probably point out to him that having a guy I don’t know chew me out for not replying after five hours and filing me away in that box of girls who only date hot guys isn’t going to impress me, and he might want to keep that in mind the next time he wants to send a girl an angry message because she didn’t just drop everything to write him back.
    I do kind of feel bad for this guy because clearly he is so insecure and bitter so I would probably not be too harsh. But does he really think he is a nice guy when he writes douchey messages like that?

  7. lol… I got an email similiar to that once. I was doing Match last year and this one guy just kept sending me email after email, wink after wink every few weeks. finally I used that “no thanks” button (which I kinda refused to do, since I really don’t want to hurt anyone) but it was necessary. I didn’t realize it pops up with WHY you’re saying no thanks, but I was gonna be honest, so I clicked “not attracted”. He emailed me some hate mail saying pretty much the same as your guy there. Ridiculous. There was also a guy whose profile I looked at and he immediately mailed me and kept harassing me saying if I looked at his profile, why didn’t I email him? Uh… because I didn’t like what I saw! I finally did reply to him, because he literally was harassing.

    ugh… dating… it sucks. however, I did meet the guy I’m casually seeing on Plenty of Fish. I’m skeptical of that site, but so far ManFriend is wonderful and I’m glad I gave it a chance ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. Emails like that are hilarious, so I’d always be interested in reading more! But it is crazy how some of these guys build their own wall and they don’t even realize it. Crazy!

  9. oh i think that’d be a funny idea. and i can’t believe he sent you that second email only a couple hours later, that’s insane, learn some wait time guy, haha.

  10. #1- DO IT!!!
    #2- I figure we’ll all know more people in hell.

  11. One of my favorite things to read on other blogs are horrific dating stories and communication mishaps on dating sites. I LOVE this! So damn funny.

    On a related note, I recently heard that the guy who started Plenty of Fish is some 50 year old Canadian guy who smokes weed all day and makes several million dollars from his site. I want that job.

  12. I got a super creepy e-mail once but don’t have it anymore – it went something along the lines of “would you be my little sister and we can climb trees and drink kool-aid together?” Umm… no thanks?

    But you should join OK Cupid… it’s free, and I met my b/f of almost 4 months on there! My friend recently found someone on their too. Both good catches. ๐Ÿ™‚ I’ve been on Plenty of Fish before and I think OK Cupid is a lot better. Good luck and if guys are going to act mean/crazy/bitter than they deserve to have their e-mails posted!

  13. hahaha, i’ve gotten some pretty crazy messages too from guys. i tried pof, but i was shocked at the replies i was getting, so i went on to okcupid and i’ve had decent luck there. i’ve been on a few dates with guys and so far i’m enjoying it.o

    but the email hall of shame is a fabulous idea!

  14. AHHH that’s hilarious. I’d be tempted to write back and snark something, but I think the best idea is to just totally ignore it. And, obviously blog about it. I think it’s a genius idea to have people send things in! What a fun feature that would be ๐Ÿ™‚

  15. i love the idea! and what a CLASSIC Nice Guy (TM). ugh. those guys are douchebags.

  16. Oh wow, I would LOVE it if you started doing that on your blog, and it even sounds like it could turn into a HUGE project, with its own blog… SO CRAZY that guys email. There really are some weirdos out there!

  17. Of course this is the same “nice” guy who also wouldn’t give a not perfect girl a chance either. He should sign his email “from the nice guy who isn’t so great looking who won’t give an out of shape “nice” girl a chance and wants to only date 10s!” Asshole! I’m so glad I never followed through with the web dating scene…

  18. Hahahahaha, that’s honestly so sad that he took the time out of his day to write that to you. It’s just so ridiculous. I would love to see more funny e-mails from guys though- it would probably be highly entertaining. I’ve been thinking of joining Plenty Of Fish, but I’m nervous. How do you like it?

  19. Don’t even get me started on the NiceGuy(TM). This whole notion that because you are nice, you *deserve* to get laid, is messed up.
    And you should most definitely go through with your idea. I loves it. I have a friend on FB right now who is posting the best profile quotes from OK Cupid. It’s pretty darn hysterical.

  20. well i have some doozies i can share with you! let me know if you decide to do a post. i think it would be freakin hilarious!

  21. This is also from someone who professes to be a nerd and yet the dude can’t put together a complete sentence?

    And a-frickin’-men to Princess Pointful.

    I would certainly have an email to contribute, but it’s not even from someone I met through a dating site!

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